Me: William come pick up your shoes and while you're at it, would you please take Lauren's Saltwater sandals and put them in her basket?
W: Oooohhhh, I can't carry 4 shoes at the same time.
M: Oh, I know you can. I have faith in you.
W: (as he fumbles about like a complete idiot on purpose) SEE? I can't. I'll just take this ONE and put it away.
Me: Here William, come help carry out some of this camping gear to the truck. This is your camping trip with daddy. I've packed it all, daddy is loading it into the truck, you need to help carry it outside. It's teamwork! (all with a stupid smile).
W: Ugh, this bag is the ugliest bag I've ever carried (as he drags his ass and the bag out to the truck)
M: Oh, good job carrying that one out to the truck, here's another.
W: ANOTHER? Ugh, this trip better be fun for all the work I'm doing for it (as he drags his ass and the bag out to the truck)
I didn't let either of those situations go, BTW, but I won't bore you with the details of megettingthelastword.
What would you do with a super lazy kid?
Eleanor, you said it, sister.