I've tried lots of positive! feel good! behavior charts and all kinds of other bullshit and honestly it's so draining to keep up with it. Maybe that is the answer and I fizzle out on it too soon but I just want them to STOP without having to get a freaking sticker or a penny or something. Just stop. Stop.
I know it's normal for siblings to argue. My brother and I are a year apart and we fought all the time. I'm not concerned for their future relationships with each other at all. I know this is how it is now and it won't forever be this way. For now I'm worried about one person. ME. I'm losing my mind. I'm losing my patience. I'm losing my temper (a lot). I'm losing my cool which in turn is making me lose my power which I will never allow to happen. I think that's part of it. I'm feeling a bit threatened by all of this fighting between them because nothing I do or say can stop it. It's like this thing that needs to run its course and it's out of my control. I'm just a helpless, bitchy witness to it all.
I don't intervene most of the time but it doesn't matter. Just hearing it is exhausting. At the end of the day I feel like I've run a marathon sometimes, just so completely wiped out. When really all I did was laundry and drop off and pick up from school, maybe went to the gym, possibly made dinner. But the physical toll that the emotional abuse I am forced to endure at the hands of my 6, 5, and 2 year old is the real deal. I'm just... exhausted.
I love love love them. But I go to the gym to get away from them. I love love love them. But I secretly sing the Hallelujah chorus in my head as I bound back down the stairs at 8:03pm everynight. I love love love them. But I let them watch 2 hours of Spongebob straight during Lauren's naptime just so they'll stay quiet.
I am out of humor when it comes to this situation, friends. They have even drained me of all my snark. That's how bad it is.
Wait! Bonus! We turn the clocks back tonight! Know what that means? An extra hour of sleep. For me, and them.