Friday, September 10, 2010

Not as I thought she'd be but pretty fabulous anyway...

I'm pretty firm and set in my beliefs and convictions and I think that's what makes parenting a not-so-overwhelming thing for me.  I don't think that I do everything right but I do the best I know how in most situations.  I don't doubt or regret much and that helps keep my head clear I think.  Chris and I are also always on the same page when it comes to parenting.  Thank God for that because as I just said, I am pretty firm and set in my beliefs and convictions... 

If you had told me 5 years, 7 months ago that the little girl I had just given birth to was going to be an outspoken, often defiant, crazy independent child by the age of 5 I would have disagreed with you.  She wouldn't become that way because I wouldn't allow it.  Because in my pre-birthing-a-child mind I thought I actually had control as to who and what she (and all my kids) would become.  Kind, responsible, well-spoken people have kind, responsible, well-spoken children, obviously.  Well, maybe not.  I know she's not even 6 yet but Drew's personality surprises me beyond words sometimes.

Chris and I are consistent in our parenting, of that I am sure.  Disrespect is never allowed.  Disobedience is never allowed.  Drew, however, continues to push and defy and has since she was two.  She needs to be reminded constantly that she is not the adult.  She acts as if you (as the adult) need to earn her respect, it's not just given to you automatically just because you are an adult.  She does what she wants and what benefits her despite what is right and what she's allowed.  That's when consequences are given - swift and severe.  This still doesn't change the behavior.  She quickly goes back to doing what benefits her.  I'm talking about little things like watching iCarly when the rule in the house is NO iCarly.  Things like sneaking a toy in her backpack to school when she knows that's not allowed.  She already has the philosophy of "asking for forgiveness is easier than asking for permission".  Whose child is this?

I'm pretty sure this is not a phase although I do understand that with continued consistency and with more life experience that she may learn to make better choices and that her behavior is undesirable to not just us but to her teachers and her friends, too.  We'll have to see.  In the meantime, I am accepting the fact that much of her is not who I thought she'd be but she's got some really great qualities I'm very proud of.  We joke that when she grows up she's going to be a strong black woman.  I have no idea where she gets her personality.  She'll probably be really firm and set in her beliefs and convictions.  Oh, crap.  Wait a second.  That sounds familiar...

So love her...


  1. She looks like her Daddy in this picture!

  2. i was exactly like you in my pre birthing a child mind. boy was i mistaken. ryan is like ryan, an emotional teenage girl and i find myself questiong where the hell did this boy come from. obviously not me, but then i realize oh wait he is exactly like me. lakota on the other hand is not emotional and is pretty even in her personality, but lately she has the attitude of a teenage girl and i question where did my little girl go? oh the joys of parenting.

  3. It's amazing how much you discover you don't know after you have kids.


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