Wednesday, June 23, 2010

snarky dog

I have lived my whole life in the central valley.  100* temperatures are more normal than not during at least 3 months out of the year.  I was a lifeguard for many years and sat my ass in the 100* sun for 8 hours a day.  Now, I can't tolerate the heat.  I'm unsure what happened.  Every year that passes I just have a harder and harder time with it.  Like an old snarky dog.  I think the tipping point for me was having a 15 month old and being 8 months pregnant and doing all that I did in the 100* heat.  I swore off loving summer after that and I have yet to regain my affection for it.

Here in the central valley we have a dry heat.  Going back east every summer I'm very familiar with the opposite of that which is hell on earth humidity.  In the heat AND humidity I am like an old snarky dog who can bitch.  I turn into this diva, this drama queen, who acts as if I am the only one who is feeling or being affected by my surroundings.  It's awful and in the moment I'm aware of my behavior but I have a hard time keeping a lid on it.  "Oh, my God.  It's so freaking hottttt."  That becomes my mantra, as if I have to announce it so others become aware of it. 

We are going to Atlanta in two days.  The weather forecast is calling for thunderstorms and NINETY TWO degrees for today, tomorrow, and the next day.  Then we show up.  To NINETY FIVE degrees.  Doesn't that sound lovely?  I'm terrified.  I've already decided that in addition to my first goal for this trip (enjoy being away from the kids), my next goal is going to be to NEVER speak the words, "Oh, my God.  It's so freaking hottttt."  I'll let you know how I do when I get back.

I saw this commercial and this is not me when I'm hungry, this is me when I'm hot.  I turn into Aretha Franklin.  A big ol' snarky dog.

3 comments:

  1. ack, I too despise the heat. Just last night I was doing my best to convince KP we should move to the coast, pismo, manhattan beach... somewhere that stays around 65... no such luck this time, but I figure one can dream! good luck & thanks for the smile :)

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  2. Ick. I've been to Atlanta in July and I don't have much hope for your goal. Someone broke the east coast this year. It's so unbelievably miserable. Our heat index today is going to be 110* and of course the humidity is just ugh - you can see it in the air. I blame BP (why not they broke the southern coast?)

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  3. People out here in California don't know what humidity is. When you're laying there at night trying to get to sleep but you're too nervous for fear you'll drowned to death in your own sweat, then you know what humidity is.

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