I've been using the term "mindful" quite a bit lately. Usually it goes like this, "Drew, you need to be more mindful of your words. Tell me what the means again?" Drew says, "I need to think about how my words will make the other person feel." I say, "Yes, now run along, and stay away from your brother."
The words stupid, hate, shutyourmouth, Idon'tlikeyou... they are beginning to flow much too freely from the mouths of these babes. They seem to know better than to ever speak to us this way, it's how they talk to each other. This must come from school, learning this kind of talk. It's not tolerated at all and the warning was given this morning that the next time I hear a hurtful work come out of someone's mouth, the punishment is going to hurt. One blanket warning and now I'm done. Now I sit and wait.
A few days ago, Drew and I were picking up the livingroom while Say Yes to the Dress was on. There was a bride who was... shall we say, definitely looking for a plus-size gown. Being the confident plus-sized woman that I am, I am conscience of the words I use and skinny and fat and all of those labels aren't things we discuss. Just like skin color isn't something I point out either. People are people and we haven't ever spoken the words that may define them by what we see. Drew was looking at her and I was wondering what she was thinking. Then she said, "That lady is soo fat." I sat her down and asked her what if that lady could have heard her. How would that have made her feel? Drew acknowledged that it would have hurt her feelings. We discussed being mindful of your words again, on a different level, and how although something is obvious, you must always consider the other person's feelings.
I am sad that Drew saw that woman's size. It's no secret that woman was extrememly big, but it still makes me sad. I don't ever want her to see anyone and have their looks define them. It's how society is but I'll do my best to teach her otherwise. Plus, she's only 5. I'm not ready for her to not see the beauty in things already. She's only 5...